What a Difference a Year Can Make

Do you ever stop to think about how much your life may change in a year?  Or even six months?  Do you document those changes or tuck them away in a corner of your mind to think about during quiet moments? 

It amazes me when I stop to think about time zooming by so fast.  It has been four and a half years since I left my Seattle job.  Three years ago I went back to finish the last few credits of my AA/BA.  Two years ago I started my MFA program.  And also two years ago, around this time, my MIL started having a series of heart attacks and other medical problems (she's a lifelong diabetic) that kept her revolving in and out of the hospital so many times I lost track.  She finally stabilized about a year ago and now she and my FIL are living in an adult family home so that has calmed things down quite a bit.  Also, two years ago (in May) was when DD found out she was pregnant and that kicked off a whirlwind of life changes.

Last year, at this time, I was getting over a back injury, and making the decision to quit my job (that I hated [so it wasn't a really difficult choice]) so I could stay home and take care of little mister.  Looking back at my blog last April, I was still struggling to find time to write, and I was concerned that my DD would move out. 

Now she's moving.  The finality of it hasn't quite set in yet.  I have been through her departure once before, so I recognize the familiar feeling of the empty nest.  That is always tough.  But this time, it will be amplified because not only do I have to worry about her out on her own, but I also have to worry about little mister.  I worry about the neighborhood they will be living in because it is scary.  I think we've watched FAR TOO MANY crime shows like Law & Order (all of them), CSI, The Closer and then the reality/documentary type like Lockup, and the First 48.  They just totally feed my imagination with all of the things that could happen and all of the nonsensical violence that is out there.  I just have to stop watching those dang shows and have faith that they will be safe, and that things will go smoothly for them.  I will miss hearing little mister, early in the morning, over the monitor as he tries valiantly to wake his mom up for the day, but at least at this point, I will still have him every afternoon/evening while DD is at work.  I know that will change one day as well.  He will go to daycare and I will need to find a job with a paycheck, but for now I will just savor each of the days that I have with him so I have them to hold me through the missing.

And now this year, we are awaiting the arrival of our second grandson, Conan.  My step-daughter is due on April 18th, so she is counting down the days and getting frustrated by the wait. It is a different feeling because they live across state and we won't get much time with the baby, so that will be hard.  Emily lives down the street from her mom over there, so she will get the majority of the grandparent benefit with him.  It will be interesting to see how the year ahead changes, and I will have more pictures to reflect on next year.

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